Why don't we like being over-served?

I have a habit of working at coffee shops in the morning; the reason I don't go to the office is that during this time, my thoughts must remain absolutely undisturbed. I haven't been to a coffee shop I used to frequent for a long time—why? It's not because the owner is bad; actually, it's because we once thought it was "too good." In the past, we were taught that doing business requires enthusiasm, making customers feel "at home." When I was young, many of the "business principles" magazines included advanced practices like "remembering customers' names, preferences, and birthdays, then giving thoughtful surprises"—which was considered advanced at the time. We would always marvel at how good this owner was at doing business, how regular customers wouldn't go anywhere else. Exactly, that's the point. Times have changed. Such practices might still work in some low-frequency businesses, but in high-frequency ones, they may have become counterproductive. I wonder if everyone has a kind of "familiarity shame"? When the owner often interacts with you, becomes friends with you, you might feel like you're being hijacked. It’s like someone scooping food into your bowl—you used to love that dish, but today you’re not so keen, yet they’ve already scooped it, and you feel awkward to refuse. What is that called? It deprives you of your freedom of choice. I found another good place recently, and I want to go there instead—can I? Of course, you can. But in our sales and business skills, we often involve binding customers to us, like collecting prepayments, topping up cards, right? Then making friends with customers so they feel embarrassed to go elsewhere, or binding them with some tactics; or using scripts to push for a sale. When I first started working, the first lesson in sales training was that deals shouldn’t drag on overnight—to prevent complications, sign the contract on the spot while the customer’s emotions are still high, strike while the iron is hot, and use every means to get the customer to sign right then and there. These techniques seem useful in the short term, but because customers’ true intentions are often distorted during free choice due to various reasons, it may look like they continue to spend at your place in the short term, but it damages their long-term loyalty to you. Familiarity shame is like, since we’re so close, I feel embarrassed to choose someone else, or it feels like a "betrayal." So, as a modern person, many no longer want to see the owner overly enthusiastic, chatting with them, or engaging in social interactions beyond the business transaction—meaning, I and you are just a simple transaction; you do your job well, and that’s enough. I want the full right to choose to be returned to me. When I decide to go elsewhere, I need to do so without any psychological burden. If you’re truly good, I might try another place, but I’ll eventually come back to you—I am free. Not like when I return, and you smile and ask, “Where have you been? I haven’t seen you in a while”—I don’t want you to ask, nor do I want to answer (because I really chose another place during that time). But if I don’t answer in person, I feel awkward; if I lie and say I was busy with work, I create a moral burden for myself. So I might choose not to come back just because I don’t want to hear you ask. Modern people prefer mutual respect, prefer paying first and receiving goods later, prefer boundaries; they dislike over-service, being disturbed, answering calls, being hijacked, or small talk with strangers. This is a change in business logic. To do business for each generation, you must first understand what kind of people they are. Authority figures’ words are not always accurate, nor are what’s written in classic books. #分享美股交易赢英伟达股票