How to change your cowardly temperament?
[1] Don't laugh all the time, especially awkwardly.
[2] is generous in rejecting others for short reasons. Longing explanations can make you the wrong party, remember, it's not your fault for rejecting others.
[3] Don't make others happy with your own troubles, and don't say things that belittle yourself and elevate others. It is better to be conservative than exaggerate, otherwise it is counterproductive and excessive.
Don't be a trash can for other people's emotions, and be quiet when others complain to you. Remember, you don't have to please anyone.
[5] No matter where you are, whatever you do, always put yourself first. Because no one cares whether you take into account the feelings of others when you speak, what everyone cares about is whether what you say involves their own interests.
[6] Remember, 99% of the people around you are offended by you, and those you cannot afford to offend have no shorts to deal with you.
[7] from now on, whenever faced with a choice. You have to move from running away from the previous ones to standing up. This little thing, Lao Tzu did, what's the matter? What has never been done, do it; If you want to pick up a conversation, go for a conversation; If you want to make a call, call immediately: the road you have never walked, even if you fail, you have nothing to lose, you have never had it in the first place.
[8] Clearly establish your own bottom lines and principles, and resolutely defend them with actions. Those who borrow money and do not repay it will be blocked; If the negative energy is bursting, stay away; Those who dare to bully you will be knocked down.
[9] Don't say that you are unworthy, what is unworthy in this world, as long as you dare, as long as you take the initiative to pursue, then there are longest beautiful things in the world, you are worth having.
[10] Dare to pause, no matter how urgent it is, pause for three seconds and then reply. For example, when someone asks a request or a question, you dare to pause, and your response will give people the feeling of careful consideration.
[11] When speaking or typing, remove mood particles such as "ah, la", for example, replace "that's it, of course, yes" with "yes, that's it, of course, yes."
[12] Slow down all movements. Turn your head, raise your hands, and get up slowly, slowly, but precisely, which will make people feel that you are calm and powerful.
[13] Except in specific circumstances, do not actively seek approval, approval or criticism from anyone.
[14] Consciously control your expressions, and do not show happiness, anger and sadness on your face. Let's not talk about the possibility, probably, Xu This kind of low-energy words, when things are uncertain, it can be said that I think about it.
[15] Walk with a firm pace, you can stride meteors, but do not lean forward, and do not bow your head. Putting your hands on your upper body will give you the impression that you are powerful, and you should not put your hands on your lower body when you are sitting, because this is low energy. You can make eye contact for a long time, your gaze is gentle and firm, you don't avoid your gaze, and you don't take your eyes off first. Walking, living, sitting and lying down should remove longest movements.
[16] Take the initiative to talk about your shortcomings: often talk about your shortcomings. Then you will find that when you admit yourself, this shortcoming doesn't seem to be a big deal. Yes, it will feel relaxed when you say it. Moreover, when others hear about your shortcomings, it is not a reaction of surprise and disgust at all, but rather a light breeze / encouragement to you. In short, go other people's way so that others have no way out.
[17] List your own strengths: Everyone absolutely knows what their strengths are, but the average person rarely praises and appreciates himself. So, please make a list of your strengths. Write your own 100 advantages. Then you'll be confident. Look at your 100 strengths every day and you'll be transformed into a confident person.
Teach you a psychological game again, and no one will dare to pinch you after you have learned it! There is an eternal characteristic of human nature, which is called "villains are afraid of power but not of virtue." ”
[1] Why is it that the more kind you are to others, the more presumptuous others become, and the more kind you are to others, the more arrogant others become?
Is it all your own reason for today's situation? Because there are two essential reasons why others are arrogant: First, it is because you have no principles in life; Second, because you have principles, but you don't have the "guts to defend your principles."
[2] The reason why a person will bully you and manipulate you to death is because he thinks he has figured you out, he thinks that you are a coward, and there is no bottom line, so he dares to be unscrupulous and unscrupulous in front of you.
It's like everyone was very polite when they first came into contact, because they didn't know each other's sex and strength, so they wouldn't be presumptuous. And in every contact in the future, in fact, the other party is constantly testing your temper.
If, in the process, the other party notices that your character is relatively cowardly, then he will definitely intensify his efforts to test your bottom line until he eats you through. Once you have formed a relatively fixed "he is strong and you are weak" mode of getting along with him, it is quite difficult to change it.
[3] So no matter who you get along with, even if he makes a joke with you in a relatively gentle way, as long as you feel uncomfortable, even if you don't fight back, you must learn to look at him expressionlessly, and learn to let the shorts condense instantly. Let him understand that you are a person's bottom line, a prickly person.
Through this kind of psychological game, let the other party understand that when talking to you and doing things in the future, you should pay attention to proportions and consider your feelings. Therefore, your position in other people's hearts is established step by step, and it is not blindly good to him, blindly tolerant and tolerant, and you have a place in his heart, which is a big mistake.
Remember, any long-lasting relationship is not the result of your submission to others, but from the fear of others.
[4] Sometimes the more willing you are to help someone, the cheaper your sincerity becomes. And usually a little colder, once in a while to lend a hand, others will be grateful.
Good people are not good, and bad people are not so bad. It's just that the bad guy has done a good deed, and there seems to be a reason to forgive. And as long as a good person does a bad thing, there is often no room for forgiveness.
[5] Don't be easily called. When you first come into contact, some people always ask you to close the door, pour a glass of water, and carry something, they are just testing whether you can control it (maybe they don't realize it's a test). As you say yes one by one, they will ask more and more long and bigger of you.
In the end, you become a bad person, not only will they not appreciate you, but they will even more prostitute you for nothing, and they will not treat you as a human being.
[6] Ambiguous semantics. If you say it, the meaning is very clear, and others will think that you are easier to deal with, like Qing Shui, very transparent. So learn to be unclear and use longer: like, probably, I don't know very well, such words. Also, use affirmative and uncertain statements alternately, so that others can't figure you out, and there is no need to get some uncertain information from you. This trick can be counterproductive if it doesn't work well.
[7] How to refuse others, one is to find all kinds of excuses: there is no shorts now, there are other things to do... The tone should be resolute and refined, don't be distracted, and it is your fault that you don't help him. The most important thing is not to look at other people's faces when you reject them.
The second is to follow the principle of value exchange. For example: "Go help me move something", "Okay, my cup is shorter, you go and fill it for me", if he agrees, you can help. If he refuses, you have a good reason for rejecting him.
[8] Why do you keep encouraging people not to be too kind? If you are kind, everyone will come and trouble you. Borrowing money, running errands, helping, begging for money.
has been kind for a lifetime, and it seems that the relationship with anyone is in the past, but the premise is that you must continue to pay in order to maintain the relationship. I used to think that helping people was a good thing, but then I realized that people who always love to help people don't end well.
If you help him once, you will help him for the rest of your life, and if you can't do that, your relationship will end here. helped a hundred times, and the one hundred and one did not help him,
As a result, he will see you as an enemy. You are in trouble and want to ask him for help, and he says to you: don't be funny, everyone is very busy.
Aren't you kind, then it's right for you to help me, if I hurt you, you won't hate me, while eating the food you gave, while crooked your mouth and secretly laughing.
The deep meaning of this sentence is to tell you: Don't imagine people so pure. Confidants are rare.
What about the people who are not so kind? They are surrounded by excellent fren. They know how to refuse, they know how to take, they know how to get angry. Of course, I understand that I give a little.
Let's think differently. Do you have to maintain all your relationships? Not really.
Meaningless socializing is a waste of time and has no value in maintaining.