The modern American career path (guy version):

18 - Borrow $92,000 for a degree everyone says is “an investment.”
22 - Graduate. Every entry level job somehow requires 4 years of experience.
24 - Land your first full time job at $41,000 a year. Promise yourself it’s just a starting point.
26 - Get a 3% raise while your rent jumps 11%.
29 - Earn a fancy new title. Your workload doubles. Your paycheck barely notices.
30 - Company announces “strategic restructuring.” Your manager survives. You don’t.
31 - Accept a new role for $6,000 more because bills don’t wait.
34 - Answer emails on weekends and call it “career growth.”
37 - Burn out in a grocery store parking lot wondering how this became normal.
39 - Ask about a raise. Get a lecture about loyalty and company culture.
41 - Your employer gets acquired. Your position disappears.
43 - Come back as a contractor doing the same work without health insurance or paid time off.
46 - LinkedIn congratulates you on being an “industry veteran.”
51 - Your doctor recommends lowering your stress. Your mortgage disagrees.
58 - Hope your retirement account survives the next market crash.
64 - Think about retiring… then open another job application.
The brochure called it the American Dream. The fine print told a different story.