Wang Zhiwen once said:

"Between spouses, there are only two things:
1. Sexual life
2. Money."
As a youth, I couldn't understand the profundity of this sentence, and even thought it was too straightforward and cold.
I always stubbornly believed that marriage relies on sincerity, tolerance, and enduring the days, thinking that linking love and affection to money and physical needs was too worldly and too unfaithful.
But reaching middle age, after witnessing countless marriages' ups and downs around me, I suddenly realized.
Those couples who drift apart, families in cold war, partners who become strangers,
are never defeated by a lack of love,
but by the absence of financial security and emotional warmth.
We often like to romanticize marriage, praising unwavering devotion.
Yet selectively ignore that marriage is the most grounded and realistic partnership in the world.
Love is responsible for the heartbeat, but money and intimacy are what truly sustain and warm the marriage.
Many misunderstand: couples talking about money is calculation; discussing intimacy is vulgar.
In fact, quite the opposite.
Money in marriage is never just about grocery shopping and daily expenses.
Its essence is whether two people share responsibility, their life rhythm, and future expectations are in sync.
Some families are not poor, yet they argue constantly.
The root cause is never lack of money, but diverging perceptions of money.
One prefers frugality and saving, worrying about the future; the other likes to indulge and enjoy the moment;
One is willing to invest in the family, the other only cares about self-enjoyment.
Differences in money views reflect a disconnect in three core values.
Accumulating over time, small grievances breed resentment, major issues create distance.
So-called incompatibility of personality or values, when peeled back, mostly stems from differing financial stances.
Without a unified material foundation, even the deepest love can gradually fade in the tug-of-war.
And intimacy between spouses is often an invisible culprit behind many marriages breaking apart.
Adult disconnection is never about loud fights, but about silent drifting away.
Many couples are partners during the day, neighbors at night.
Sharing the same space, yet no touch, no comfort, no private words.
Handling life during the day, playing on phones at night, emotions unspoken, exhaustion unaccepted.
Many people mistakenly see intimacy as just physical needs, which is the biggest misconception.
A couple’s intimacy is an emotional bond unique to lovers.
It’s a reliance in exhaustion, a comfort in grievances,
a tacit warmth in daily trivialities.
Physical closeness is always the most honest reflection of feelings.
Long-term distance, resistance, and no interaction will completely disconnect the emotional fields of two people.
Gradually, they stop sharing daily life, stop explaining grievances, stop caring for each other.
Eventually, from being open about everything, they become speechless.
Yu Hua once said something very poignant:
A long-lasting marriage depends not on fleeting passion, but on subtle warmth and solid confidence.
I deeply agree.
Romance is the embellishment of marriage, but money and intimacy are the backbone.
Money stabilizes the foundation of life, preventing trivial conflicts from eroding feelings;
Intimacy preserves mutual warmth, preventing the two from growing apart.
People in middle age finally understand:
The clearest way to live in marriage is never to entangle in fleeting romance.
Work together to earn money, strengthen the small household’s foundation; treat each other gently, maintain close warmth.
Manage these two matters well,
Marriage doesn’t need to be artificially maintained; it will naturally be stable and long-lasting, peaceful year after year.