I often tease women—she’s got nothing but you on her mind.



1. Is there any tender new grass? The old cow misses you.
2. I’m poisoned. The doctor says intimacy is the cure.
3. If we can’t get rich overnight, holding you tight for one night is fine too.
4. Confession should be one step and done—hi. Want to be buried together?
5. If you can’t stand it, get lost. I’ve already laid out the sheets on my bed.
6. Can’t sleep? Don’t force it. Without my presence, you won’t be able to fall asleep properly.
7. Can you help me call a car? I want to go into your heart.
8. I don’t miss you at all—only at 1:30 do I start missing you.
9. Don’t try the beauty scheme on me, or I’ll play along and make it backfire on you.
10. Touch my clothes—am I the type to be your boyfriend?
11. I can’t do being a good person, and I don’t dare do being a bad one either—I just want to be the one you hold in your heart.
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