Launching virtual coins: my personal obsession with leaving my financial decisions to chance

Damn it! Do I have to flip a coin again to decide whether to buy that Bitcoin that's been tempting me for weeks? Shit, what stress...

When I find myself caught between buying more crypto or paying the rent ( that is already overdue), I turn to my old friend: virtual coin. Who needs technical analysis when you can leave your financial future in the hands of a random algorithm?

The internet is plagued with these digital tools that simulate the classic heads or tails. I personally use them even to decide whether to reply to my ex's messages, who insists that I return his 0.1 ETH. Let's explore this absurd world where we leave important decisions to a simple click!

Why the hell are we using this?

1. Because we are pathological indecisives

• Why think when a program can decide for you? It's the perfect excuse for when you mess up: "It wasn't me, it was the virtual coin!"
• Whether it's to enter a high-risk trade or to decide whether to respond to that broker message that calls you for the fifth time, the coin never fails!

2. The digital era and our laziness

• Who the hell carries physical coins today? I already have enough to carry my phone to see how my investments are crashing in real time.
• With two clicks you have a "random decision" that is likely more accurate than the last recommendation from that influencer you followed.

The best options for those who can't decide

1. The Google option

• You literally write "flip a coin" and that's it. Even my grandmother could use it! (And it does it to decide which shitcoin to buy each week).

2. Those websites that nobody remembers

• Platforms like FlipSim or JustFlipACoin that seem straight out of 1999 but surprisingly work very well.
• They have ridiculous animations that make me feel like I'm in Las Vegas instead of on my couch in my underwear eating ramen.

3. Apps for launch addicts

• For those of us with withdrawal syndrome if we can't flip a coin every five minutes.
• Some even track your results, in case you need to prove that life is conspiring against you when you lose eight times in a row.

How to use this revolutionary technology (pure irony)

Step 1: Find any of these tools

• Browser? App? The voice in your head? Any of them works.

Step 2: Set up your existential dilemma

• "Cara: I invest my savings in that new coin that a guy mentioned in Telegram"
• "Cruz: I'm still eating this week"

Step 3: Contemplate your destination

• The animation spins, your heart stops... and out comes a cross! Well, the coin has spoken. Today we eat.

The science behind (if there is any)

1. Probability and self-deception

• In theory it is 50/50, just like my chances of recovering my initial investment someday.
• After enough launches, the results tend to balance out... unlike my portfolio.

2. Algorithms are not that random

• Those online tools use algorithms that try to simulate randomness, just like I try to simulate that I know what I'm doing with my investments.
• Some talk about using blockchain for this. Really? Do we need a blockchain to decide whether to order pizza or a hamburger?

Questions that nobody asks but I still answer

Is it free? Yes, unlike my financial mistakes that continue to cost me a fortune.

Are they really random? As random as my trading strategies.

Can I launch many times? Sure, like those 27 times I launched until I got the result I wanted.

Do they work without internet? Some apps do, for when you're desperate making decisions while hiking trying to forget your losses.

The next time you have to decide between two impossible options in the crypto world, remember: a virtual coin may be wiser than many "experts" in the field. And definitely more honest!

Heads or tails for your next investment? The answer is just a click away.