How should I write about myself? Writing about how I toss and turn at midnight, reminiscing about my first half of life and unable to sleep; writing about my school days when I was unmotivated, playful, and wasted my studies; writing about how I deceive myself every day into thinking I'm happy, when in fact I lack the courage to live; writing about feeling dazed, having finished the first half of my life without any skills; writing about not having a stable job, yet drifting around for a long time; writing about not having dreams and muddling through each day.


All the way here, stumbling and falling, only I know the warmth and cold, my eyes have long lost their light, like a soulless machine. Talking about the past feels like a joke; talking about the future feels like a fantasy; talking about the present is a muddled state of achieving nothing.
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