EnormousJames

Mindblowing that this mobile phone game crossed $1 BILLION in user spending in its first year and makes $2-3mm per day. People will literally just pay you to play games

I think I got rugged @moonpay

It’s hard to get out of your comfort zone. But when you do, what actually happens is your comfort zone expands to where you are now. It’s like when you unlock a new land in a video game and the clouds on the map disappear.

Me on @moonshot:

Best bang for your buck prank you can do is with a plastic cockroach. At home, at work, in public, it works everywhere on almost everyone

Now that everyone’s timeline is fixed, it’s good time to remind them that we never left..
1 ape = 1 ape

Hoka shoes look like they should come with a helmet. They probably sell more if they had Velcro. Why would anybody buy this??

We gotta give the ancient Roman and Italian sculptors credit bc this generation didn’t inherit those skills

Don’t tell me about diamond hands, I’m a community member for life

You’re walking alone in the woods. You see Bigfoot! You quickly take a photo of him, but he sees you and charges! Would you rather:
A) He immediately rips off all your limbs and you die, but eventually they find your mangled body and your phone and you are remembered forever as the guy who found Bigfoot
B). He drags you back to his cave and pounds you in the ass for an entire night with his Bigdong, but then lets you go free. You still have your phone with the photo and can go on a national press tour and talk about how you survived an encounter with Bigfoot.