You're broke and powerless.

Since you were a kid, your parents told you:
"Our family is poor; we can't afford to offend anyone."
While others went to school, you couldn't compete with thugs for a girlfriend.
And what if you entered society silently?
The woman you like,
Would rather be with someone else, living in a three- or four-bedroom house,
and wouldn't even glance at you.
You have needs too.
Can't afford to marry, but chatting with someone shouldn't be a problem, right?
So you muster up the courage to confess and start a conversation.
You still remember when she looked at you,
with that kind of contempt and vitality in her eyes,
like she was looking at a disgusting bug.
Not only that, she also goes around telling others:
"You're such a loser, no money but still dreaming of eating swan meat."
Almost 30 years old, and you’ve achieved nothing.
Your parents take out their life savings and insist on finding a wife for you.
Now it doesn’t matter if she’s pretty or if her figure is good.
Having been self-sufficient in a dark room for over ten years,
you’ve never tasted what a woman’s like.
Your luck is really bad,
the matchmaker’s candidate is either so ugly she looks like a pig,
or a retiree from a nightclub.
You can’t care so much anymore,
you just want to try something new once.
It’s not your luck, just like Qing didn’t care about being a scapegoat,
drinking, marrying a short, fat woman, and having a son.
But what does that matter?
You tell your son:
"Our family is poor; we can't afford to offend others."
Hardship, repeatedly changing and starting over,
only to realize that this is the most human thing in the world.