There is no "it's not about you, it's about the matter" in this society.

It's all about "it's not about the matter, it's about the person."
Think about it carefully:
If I have a good relationship with you, I can give you some leeway;
If I have feelings for you, I won't make things difficult for you.
This applies to love, relationships, and all kinds of interactions.
As long as you consider my feelings, I will consider yours.
The rules of this society are actually simple to the point of being outrageous.
There are not that many twists and turns.
The underlying logic can be summarized in one sentence:
If I have a good relationship with you, I am willing to compromise; I am willing to consider your feelings.
Remember:
If someone tells you "it's not about the money,"
It’s actually definitely about the money.