In China, parents are often seen as unconditional givers, but in reality, many parents do not have the ability to truly "be parents". They use "I am for your good" and "blood is thicker than water" to cover up emotional control and hurt, and once their children violate their arrangements, they are labeled as "unfilial". This emotional kidnapping often comes from their unhealed trauma, narcissistic personality needs, and functional exploitation of the child. Many children grow up in depression and indifference, not to be loved, but to be obedient.

True emotional violence is not occasional arguments, but rather long-term, persistent, and unpredictable devaluation, manipulation, and psychological oppression. This pattern of interaction profoundly undermines a child's sense of security and self-awareness, shaping anxious, avoidant, and even disorganized attachment styles that can impact their entire life. Children raised in such an environment often struggle to develop a stable sense of self and continuously suppress their true feelings just to maintain "harmony."